GRAMMY NOMS ARE IN AND IDK HOW I FEEL

The 60th Annual Grammy Awards are upon us, and earlier than usual it seems. The show will air January 28th on CBS from Madison Square Garden, NYC. Yes, you read that correctly. NYC.Madison-Square-Garden

This upsets me because I moved to Los Angeles with the idea in my head that at the very least I’d be standing a safe distance away from the building at the 2018 Grammy Awards. this would be easily accomplished by car.

Now, I have to get on a fucking airplane for the chance. And like idk, maybe I won’t. I don’t like the cold and it will be January in New York so, idk.

giphy

Okay so moving past the location fiasco, this past year was insane for music. Incredible projects popped up left and right from newcomers like Khalid and old favorites like Jay Z (while truthfully I didn’t give 4:44 more than a few listens–I’ve been pissed at him for cheating since “Irreplaceable” told the woke people what the fuqq was up in ’06)

But okay, okay, let’s look at some of the most exciting categories (with my favorites in purple) before I continue with my commentary:

SONG OF THE YEAR:  (Ehh)

1-800-273-8255 

Logic, Alessia Cara, Khalid

Issues

Julia Michaels

That’s What I Like 

Bruno Mars

Despacito (Remix)

Justin Bieber, Luis Fonsi, Daddy Yankee

4:44

Jay Z

ALBUM OF THE YEAR (Okay Lorde standing her own with all these grown ass men)

“Awaken, My Love!”

Donald Glover

“4:44”

Jay Z

“24K Magic”

Bruno Mars

“Melodrama”

Lorde

“Damn.”

Kendrick Lamar

BEST RAP ALBUM (Is there even a contest)

Flower Boy

Tyler, The Creator

Culture

Migos

Laila’s Wisdom

Rapsody

4:44

Jay Z

Damn.

Kendrick Lamar

RECORD OF THE YEAR (daylighttt)

“HUMBLE.” 

Kendrick Lamar

“Redbone”

Donald Glover

“24K Magic”

Bruno Mars

“The Story Of O.J.” 

Jay Z

“Despacito (Remix)”

Justin Bieber, Luis Fonsi, Daddy Yankee

BEST NEW ARTIST (i have no reaction to this and idk what that means)

Alessia Cara

Lil Uzi Vert

Julia Michaels

Khalid

SZA

BEST POP VOCAL ALBUM (FUQQ YEA LANA/KESHA {I’m so over Ed Sheeran omfg})

Joanne

Lady Gaga

Evolve

Imagine Dragons

Kaleidoscope

Coldplay

÷

Ed Sheeran

Lust for Life

Lana Del Rey

Rainbow 

Kesha

BEST POP SOLO PERFORMANCE (FUQQ EVERYONE BUT KESHA)

“Shape of You”

Ed Sheeran

“Love So Soft”

Kelly Clarkson

“Million Reasons”

Lady Gaga

“What About Us”

P!nk

“Praying” 

Kesha

I’m cutting it off there because there are like 84 Grammy categories and I do not have that kind of time.

If you have that kind of time, click here for the full list of 2018 Grammy nominees.

I’m elated at the attention Kesha, Kendrick Lamar, Lana Del Rey, & SZA received from the academy but I do wish we would’ve seen a nom for Harry Styles’s ballad-heavy, self titled solo debut album–it seems though that the academy’s disdain for One Direction didn’t die with the band.

Harry-Styles-Sings-One-Direction-Solo-Tour

Zayn, however, was nominated for his work with the snake for 50 Shades Darker, “I Don’t Wanna (Live Forever)”.  If he wins, he’ll be the only former One Direction member to ever win, but for now he’s just the only former One Direction member to ever be nominated.

Going back to my elation about Kesha’s recognition: HFS I’ve never been so happy about a Grammy nominee, I think. After the fuqqed up situation she lived for so long, she deserves every ounce of goodness that comes her way. Plus her album was really, really fuqqing good. I lived each song in some way, you know? Still do. That shit doesn’t happen with every album I listen to. Plus her concert was dope.

kesha-fallon-aug-2017-billboard-1548

PLUS: “Old Flames” (track 12 on Rainbow) is a cover of the song that Kesha’s mom wrote for Dolly Parton to sing on her 1980 smash Dolly, Dolly, Dolly. So obviously that’s fuqqing dope.

ANYWAY, THOUGHTS OVER THE OTHER NOMS:

1-800-273-8255 deserves the honor of Song of the Year. Logic, Alessia Cara, and Khalid shed so much-needed light on mental health. Their powerful performance at the 2017 VMAs reminded us that their song wasn’t just a catchy chart topper–it’s real. If you or anyone you know is contemplating suicide, reach out to the suicide hotline immediately.

Cardi B has continued destroying records, and is now the first solo female rap artist to be nominated for Best Rap Performance.

KSmMBEvY

She will also ‘B’ up against her fiancé, Offset, in said category–(the birth of a new music dynasty?).

With his many Emmy and Grammy wins, Donald Glover is well on his way to EGOT status, and that is impressive as fuqq–and goals as fuqq.

Understandably, “Despacito” was honored despite being one of the most over-played songs ever but it was, after all, like one of the biggest songs in the world. It is the first non-english song to be nominated for both Song and Record of the Year.

I ~almost~ have the entire chorus memorized.

Though she’s never won, this is the first time Katy Perry was not recognized for an eligible body of work. And I mean, Witness was alright, you know…but bitch also stole my googly eye look so idk.

061517-katy-perry

Apparently there’s major drama in the music theatre world when it comes to Grammy nominations but that’s going to take a lot to get into so just take my word for it.

Season seven of Game of Thrones received a nod from the academy, as Ramin Djawadi’s score was nominated for Best Score Soundtrack for Visual Media (against La La Land –which I wasn’t that impressed with?–Arrival, Hidden Figures, and Dunkirk–at least something Harry Styles was apart of was nominated).

Also, excuse me while I lol so hard bc “Look What You Made Me Do” was eligible…and the other two atrocity singles the snake put out this year but all of them were passed up.

kim-kardashian-gif

“LWYMMD” was even eligible for best music video but nah, they saw right through that shit.

d36cf24a99de6f7870fade0a84e00041--kim-kardashian-laughing

People are saying Ed Sheeran was snubbed but like Divide was annoying, so, no. He wasn’t.

2018’s list of nominees does hit on an important trend. The academy appears to have taken streaming success into consideration, as most of the categories are dominated by online chart toppers. And they did a modestly better job of beefing up diversity throughout all categories except Record of the Year (all men).

So anyway, despite my deeply felt annoyance around this year’s location change and lack of je ne sais quoi, I’ll definitely be tuning in. I have no idea who’z slated to perform but that will make the show a lil more exciting, I think.

As always, check out my Twitter page that day for the most annoying barrage of hilarious real-time Grammy commentary.

-chasertheprince

 

****note: i do not own any of the above images, and I’m okay with that.****

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